"Sticks and stones may break my bones but squats will make me badass.” - Unknown
Contrary to what you might think, muscles grow not during workouts but in the hours afterward [1, 2, 3, 4]. Working out incentivizes muscle growth, but muscles grow only through proper nutrition and health.
Trying to build muscle through lifting alone is like building a house without the needed materials. All you end up with is a crappy house made out of scraps. In this analogy, the house is your body, and the materials represent your nutrition. Crappy nutrition = crappy body.
For evidence, feel free to roam around your local gym and ask people how long they've been working out. Then, ask them, "What is the most important thing for growing muscle?" We guarantee that the buff dudes will always say nutrition (the meatheads will say protein; forgive them, as it's the same thing) while the skinny folk will say something different.
Before attempting to begin the workout programs below, get your nutrition and health down as much as possible. Without both drilled down, it will take years instead of months to get to the ideal physique! If you're ok with that, take your time and enjoy the ride.
General information for your workouts:
Make sure to read through these toggles before continuing to the workout plans. They will speed up your progress even more! The toggles marked with a "★" are especially important and our personal favorites.
Switch to mobile if you have Strong
If you have downloaded Strong (the recommended workout app), make sure that you continue reading on your phone to download the workout routines. If you're already on your phone, that's weird. This guide looks way better on a desktop browser.
Anyways, if you are instead keeping track of your workouts in a journal or using a different app, then continue reading on whatever device you're currently on.
To easily switch over to mobile:
- Take out your phone
- Open the camera app
- Point it at the QR code and press your finger on it
- Then click the link that pops up!
Getting the programs
If you cannot go to the gym, check out the Home Workout Programs.
The training programs—like the nutritional phases—are conveniently split into three parts:
TheFoundational Program gets you started
The Hypertrophy Program maximizes muscle growth
The 
Maintenance Program outlines how to stay at the ideal
To prevent confusion between the nutrition and training pages, note that you will always be in a nutrition phase while using a training program. Simple!
Read both options below and then head to the workout program you must attend. When you're done, return to this page and continue with the guide, like on the previous page.
Remember to click the bold, underlined links above to go to the page you need to be at. After getting your training program details, return here to finish the page.
When to switch training programs
As per the infographic above, after you run the foundational program for eight weeks, you'll never run it again. Instead, you'll switch to the hypertrophy program to take advantage of your newly built foundation.
Once you are on the hypertrophy program, you will only switch off of it once you reach the ideal (as outlined soon below). At that point, you'll switch to the maintenance program to stay at ideal forever.
If you want to remember all this stuff and are considering taking notes, don't. We've already done the work for you and condensed this entire guide into one "cheat sheet" that you can get access to by signing up below:
If you've already received the cheat sheets, good on you. You're almost done reading this entire not-so-long guide. Now, back to the science.
How to measure for ideal
Once you have cycled through cutting and bulking twice while working out —about 6 to 8 months for the average individual— you'll be very close to the ideal physique!
To check, cut down until you reach a body mass index (BMI) score of 21 and check what your body fat percentage (BFP) is on your smart scale.
If you're curious why the ideal male body is achieved at a body mass index score of 21 and a body fat percentage below 12%, you've forgotten the science on the first page of this guide!
As a quick refresher, the average man and woman found men with a BMI of 21 most attractive. Additionally, men who were at or below 12% BFP were found to be the most attractive to most people!
Besides these numbers correlating with high levels of attractiveness, having a BMI score of 21 at 12%, BFP is also well within the range of healthy body weights. If you want to refresh yourself on why this is so beneficial, check out this guide's cheat sheet!
Remember, the ideal body designed by this guide was carefully formulated to prepare the owner for everything life will throw at them mentally, physically, and, of course, sexually. Getting your body to have a BMI score of 21 at 12% BFP does that.
Continuing on
After you get the information for your shiny, new training program, you are more than welcome to browse the 
Training Research page for all the studies cited to create the training programs.
Not that you asked, but over 130 research papers' worth of information are condensed onto this page. If you're still not the research type, we no longer know what to say to you.
6. Nutrition 8. Motivation